Canadian Tuxedo Blog

Ahh. Wal-Mart!

2010-03-25T14:54:00.000-07:00

VERRRRY rare. The skirt CT!

2010-03-25T14:53:00.000-07:00

Is that embroidered?

2010-03-25T14:52:00.000-07:00

I would like to thank this guy's mom for dressing him!

2010-03-20T12:02:00.000-07:00

This guy had to be 6'10".

2010-03-20T12:01:00.000-07:00

Airport security surely stopped this woman!

2010-03-20T12:00:00.000-07:00

May not count, but.....

2010-03-08T21:01:00.002-08:00

Nice buns, blondie!

2010-03-08T21:01:00.001-08:00

NASCAR races are a great place to find Canadian Tuxedos on people of all ages.

This guy is kickin too much ace!

2010-03-08T21:00:00.001-08:00

Dude has his own checkered flag. Enough said!

He wears jorts, jorts!

2010-03-08T20:59:00.000-08:00

Look closely in the background and there is another CT. It's a two-for.

2010-03-08T20:58:00.002-08:00

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Wowzers, Batman. What the hell is this guy doing?

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Livin on a Prayer!

2010-03-05T13:21:00.001-08:00

Whoah, we're half way there! What exactly made these Nancy boys dress up in the same outfit? I bet they went to the piercing parlor to get matching belly button rings!

Thanks, Kasie for the pic!

Too easy.

2010-02-21T11:41:00.000-08:00

It doesn't count because they're actually a track team, I just wanted to beat D-Rock to the punch. Congrats to the Fighting Tigers on their shiny trophies.

Fair and Balanced

2010-02-21T10:30:00.000-08:00

As I've stated previously I don't want to exclusively bash LSU fans on this site because I enjoy the state of Louisiana enough to want to be able to return to it one day. Drive-thru daquiris, endless tailgating, and spicy, meat-based meals aren't easy to come by in the rest of the country. Y'all keep doing your thing, you batshit crazy, French Common law influenced champions of l-i-v-i-n. Louisianans live life with a fervor and gusto that shouldn't be punished, but having said that there plenty of fanbases ripe for derision.

We're far from the first to point out laughable tendancies like the track suit thing. In his book Dixieland Delight, Clay Travis coined the term "Bama bangs" and noted their spread throughout the southeastern USA. He also made note of Florida's coeds and the unusual amount of fat they carry on the backs of their arms, now lovingly referred to as "bingo wings." In this post from the EDSBS archives Spencer and the commenter army compile quite a list, including Georgians with red slacks and Florida State's unusual fancy for Toby Keith. Gator jorts like the ones on The Tebow Child above have been covered by most including the aptly named DenimJorts, who refers to them as "knee jeans."

So spread the hate. Let us know what group you mock behind their unknowing backs at purpletracksuit@gmail.com.

Denim Dan, the Danarino, makin' copies...

2010-02-21T09:28:00.001-08:00

Homeskillet already copied her (his?) clothing, might as well take care of those TPS reports as well.

How Many Cajun Tuxedos Do You See?

2010-02-21T09:23:00.000-08:00

If you fell while taking this photo you'd probably land one one.

It's hard to sneak up these Cajuns in their tracksuits!

2010-02-21T09:20:00.000-08:00

I can only presume they're waiting in line for bourbon or corn dogs.

Corn Dog Fever!

2010-02-21T09:19:00.001-08:00

G'Day Mate! The Rare Australian Tuxedo

2010-02-21T09:14:00.000-08:00

No Matching Hat?

2010-02-21T09:10:00.000-08:00

What qualifies?

2010-02-20T22:15:00.000-08:00

We're looking for Cajun and Canadian tuxedoes. LSU tracksuits are easy to spot, you just want to make sure the trousers match the jacket. On second thought scratch that, I might actually want to see a mismatched tracksuit. I suppose any combination of purple and gold tracksuits will work and they can be made of velour, satin, vinyl, whatever. If you catch the Tigers in action you'll have plenty to choose from as evidenced from the above photo that was swiped from Friends of the Program. I know it's difficult to ignore the woman dressed as a tiger but the fella on the left blends in well in Baton Rouge and that's exactly what we're looking for.

EDIT: You can click on the picture to enlarge it and spot a second tracksuit in the background by the stop sign. Stereotypes don't invent themselves.

Not me.

Canadian tuxedoes are just as easy to spot but they're a tad more complicated. The classic look is a pair of jeans with a jean jacket, usually with a plaid button-up shirt. But you also have the long-sleeve denim shirt sans jacket, the ever rare short-sleeve denim shirt with jeans, and the unicorn of denim on denim crime: short sleeve denim shirt with matching jorts. I've never seen this and I live in Florida, a veritable stronghold of the jort wearing demographic also known as Florida Gator fans. Extra points will be offered for the full-on evening wear Canadian tux consisting of a denim shirt, pants, AND jacket combo. Not that we're keeping score or anything.

Bienvenue!

2010-02-20T21:29:00.000-08:00

Welcome to Canadian Tuxedo Blog, yet another webpage that will survive on the diligent efforts of its readers and their desires to make themselves feel better by mocking the lifestyles of others. As a different twist we'll also be pointing fingers and giggling at Cajun tuxedoes. What's that, you ask? Read on, you adverturous sex kitten.

We were inspired to set up shop on Thanksgiving while at fellow founding father D-Rock's house. Both his mother and uncle showed up for the holiday feast decked out in head to toe denim and then had the nerve to look and laugh at people of Wal-Mart after dinner. The following day we attended an LSU football game in Baton Rouge, Louisiana where we discovered a local affinity for purple track suits. This occurred in 2009, and in our opinion you should only wear a track suit in the current era if you're 1) and athlete or 2) a member of Run DMC. It's not 1987 for chrissakes. Why did it take almost three months to get the blog up and running? We're fucking lazy, that's why. And who are you to ask? You're reading a blog that makes fun of decent, hardworking people. I bet you're supposed to be working right now, or being a better parent, or getting some God damn exersize for a change. So pipe down already. I'm doing the talking here.

It should be noted that we have nothing personal against the fine nation of Canada or the colorful culture of Louisiana. I've played in and attended enough hockey games to know all the words to Oh Canada and D-Rock is part Cajun. As a matter of fact we love and admire LSU fans for their ability to cook meat and imbibe alcohol at a rate that would kill most farm animals. Did you know they also smell like corn dogs? You should ask one about it sometime, they love that. And Canada's chief exports include manners and Alan Thicke, so that's nice.

We're avid college football fans and despite conflicting views on the Scopes Monkey trial we both believe in evolution. So if you're stuck in the midst of a fanbase with a tacky stereotype we'd love to hear about it, but don't tell us things like "Wisconsin fans are fat and stupid" or "Arizona fans are are all syphillitic meth addicts." First off everyone knows those things, but more importantly we're not trying to be labeled bigots and we definitely don't want to get sued. It's all in good fun.

So start sending in pictures! Anyone wearing an LSU tracksuit or double denim is fair game. In finale, we dedicate this blog in the name of our spiritual godfather, Jay Leno.

Just look at him. That's how you kick ass, campers.